How to Smoke a Cigar and Your Disgruntled Ex-Wife

How to smoke a cigar is not nearly as important for aficionados as the care that needs to be taken if the cigars you smoke are from Cuba. This is especially true if you have a vindictive and devious ex-wife. Professionally, as a practicing attorney in the United States 7th Circuit Court of Appeals in Chicago, I came across the humorous case of Richard S. Connors.

According to 7th Circuit Court Judge Terrence T. Evans (who, if I were a betting man, "knows how to smoke a cigar" as well), Cuban cigars have a definite cachet:

Despite some controversy over the degree to which Cuba (where tobacco was first encountered by European explorers) has been able to maintain the quality of its cigars under communist rule, it is undisputed that the leaves grown in the fertile soil of the Vuelta Abajo, in the western province of Pinar del Río, cultivated and prepared according to centuries-old traditions, produce an incomparably smooth, pungent, and full-bodied smoke. See James Suckling, "On the Road to Tobacco Country: A journey into the Vuelta Abajo, land of the world's best cigar leaves," Cigar Aficionado magazine, May/June 2001.

Apparently Chicago attorney Richard S. Connors agreed. According to the reported opinion in the case of United States v. Connors, 441 F.3d 527 (7th Cir. 2006), between 1996 and 1999, Connors ran a fairly lucrative Cuban cigar smuggling operation, having made some thirty-one trips to Cuba, re-entering the United States from places like Toronto and Cancun.

During Connors' eleven day trail for smuggling Cuban cigars into the United States, conspiracy, making a false statement on a passport application and violating the Trading with the Enemy Act, the government's star witness was Special Agent John Sheridan of the U.S. Customs Service.

Sheridan's chief source of information was Connor's ex-wife, Nicole Chakalis. Thanks to the information Chakalis provided, Connors was stopped at the Canadian border on his way back to the United States. Connors had 46 boxes of Cuban Cigars tucked away inside of four suitcases. Over the next 3 years, Chakalis continued to provide Sheridan with information about Connors's travels, dealings, and associates-information she was able to obtain by renewing her relationship with Connors and spending weekends at his house.

Connors was unaware of his ex-wife's cooperation until after the trial when, apparently remorseful, she told him what she had done. At a post-trial hearing, she testified that Sheridan not only asked her to cozy up to Connors but also suggested that she obtain incriminating documents from his house and place them in the trash for Sheridan to retrieve.

As noted by Judge Evans:

Divorce rates are disturbingly high. Sometimes, marital splits get nasty when an ex-spouse decides to dish out a little dose of discomfort to his or her former partner. And as far as dishing out discomfort is concerned, the havoc visited on Chicago lawyer Richard Connors by his ex-wife would win a gold medal for creativity.

Although there are many places on the Internet where one can mail order Cuban cigars from overseas suppliers, the importation of such cigars could result in serious criminal penalties. Cuba, since shortly after Fidel Castro's assumption of power in 1959, has been one of the major targets of the 1917 Trading with the Enemy Act (50 U.S.C. App. Sections 50(b)(1) and (16)) which imposes an embargo on bringing Cuban products into the United States.

So when you consider how to smoke a cigar, caution is warranted if you smoke them in front of your disgruntled ex-wife! Rather than risking the perils that may await you from ordering Cuban cigars from overseas suppliers, we have found two great alternatives.

• Cuban Crafters Cigars offer a fine selection of Tabacalera Esteli cigars. They start with tobaccao leaves grown from Cuban seed on 275 acres in Esteli, Nicaragua. The rich soil and perfect tobacco growing temperature and humidity produces top grade tobacco, which is grown, picked, aged and hand rolled at the Tabacalera Esteli facilities. They make their cigars the old fashion way; hand rolled in a labor-intensive seven part process, in small batches, by skilled masters trained by Cuba's finest master rollers. Cuban Crafters is the exclusive worldwide distributor of Tabacalera Esteli's fine cigars and cigar accessories.

• Thompson Cigar has been around since 1915. In addition to the Thompson brand cigars, which are available no where else, Thompson also sells just about every major brand of cigars such as Cohiba, Arturo Fuente, Partagas and more. They have the most complete selection of cigars you will find anywhere, including exclusive brands as well as Dominican, Honduran and Nicaraguan origin cigars. Thompson typically offers cigar samplers at terrific prices, and often runs great specials, including their "Deal of the Day." In addition to a wide array of cigars, they offer a full range of cigar accessories and information, such as their "Cigar 101" informational material.
  

Both of these fine companies have been around for a long time, are extremely reliable, and their shipments are guaranteed, as is your complete satisfaction. When considering how to smoke a cigar, consider the offerings from these two great companies.

Dave and Jeff